# When school is hard: part-time timetables, exclusions and attendance > When school is too hard for an autistic child, you may see meltdowns or exhaustion after school, not being able to go in, or worry before school days. In England, guidance says a part-time timetable should have your agreement and an end date, being sent home for behaviour is a suspension, and excluding a child simply because the school feels it cannot meet their needs is unlawful. Start with the SENCO and get free advice. - Canonical page: https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/guides/when-school-is-hard - Publisher: Rocks Make Pebbles (https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk) - Topic: Nursery, school and SEND - Applies to: England - Last updated: 28 September 2026. Checked against sources: 28 September 2026 - Professional review: Not yet reviewed (waiting for review by a SEND legal adviser) - Drafted with the help of AI tools and checked against the sources listed below. Editorial policy: https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/editorial-policy ## Key points - Meltdowns or exhaustion after school can mean your child is working very hard to cope during the day. - A part-time timetable should have your agreement, regular reviews and an end date. It should not be used to manage behaviour. - Being sent home for behaviour, even for half a day, is a suspension. It must be recorded and confirmed in writing. - Schools must report any significant use of force to you, aiming for the same day, and should do it in writing. - Ask the SENCO for more support, request an EHC needs assessment if needed, and get free advice from SENDIASS or IPSEA. ## How can I tell if school is too hard for my child? Often you see it at home, not at school. The NHS says an autistic child's behaviour "at school and home may be different and they may need time to settle when they return from school" ([NHS](https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/autism/supporting-a-child/)). So "they're fine at school" and "they fall apart at home" can both be true. Signs that school is taking too much out of your child include: - [meltdowns](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#meltdown), shutdowns, tears or silence straight after school - not wanting to go, or not being able to get out of the door, through the gate or into the classroom - worry before school days, such as a churning stomach, feeling sick or poor sleep, which the National Autistic Society lists among signs of anxiety ([National Autistic Society](https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/mental-health/anxiety/parents)) - [masking](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#masking), meaning hiding their differences to get through the day. The National Autistic Society says children may mask "to cope at school and avoid negative attention or punishment (for example for moving around or stimming)" ([National Autistic Society](https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/behaviour/masking)) - tiredness that builds over weeks. The NHS says some autistic children "can become very exhausted from trying to cope with daily life. This is called autistic fatigue or burnout" ([NHS](https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/autism/supporting-a-child/)); see [autistic burnout](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#autistic-burnout) None of this means you, your child or the school has failed. It tells you your child needs more support, or a different set-up. > **Get help now:** If your child stops eating, sleeping or leaving the house, has been hurt, or talks about harming themselves, get medical advice promptly from your GP or NHS 111. In an emergency, call 999. In Northern Ireland, where there is no NHS 111, call your GP or the [GP out of hours service](https://www.nidirect.gov.uk/articles/gp-out-hours-service). ## What is emotionally based school avoidance, and what helps? [Emotionally based school avoidance (EBSA)](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#ebsa) is a name for when a child finds it very hard to go to school because of anxiety or distress. It is not a legal term. DfE's statutory attendance guidance (July 2026) talks instead about "anxious feelings about school attendance" ([DfE attendance guidance](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a4f9ec6a6586e258d371bd0/Working_together_to_improve_school_attendance_2026.pdf)). The guidance says pupils with SEND have "the same" right to education, and "additional support may need to be provided". Schools are not expected to diagnose or treat, but they should: - offer pastoral support - make formal [reasonable adjustments](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#reasonable-adjustments) for disabled pupils under section 20 of the Equality Act 2010, agreed and regularly reviewed with you and your child - consider "a time-limited phased return to school" for children with anxious feelings about attendance - remove barriers in school, such as uniform, transport, routines, access to support and lunchtime arrangements - if your child has an EHCP, tell the council when attendance falls and work with it to add attendance support to the plan It also says medical evidence for recording absences "should only be needed in a minority of cases" ([DfE attendance guidance](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a4f9ec6a6586e258d371bd0/Working_together_to_improve_school_attendance_2026.pdf)). ### What can I do? 1. Keep a short daily note: sleep, mood before school, what happened, and how your child was afterwards. 2. Plan quiet recovery time after school, with few questions or demands. 3. Ask to meet the class teacher and [SENCO](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#senco). Take your notes. 4. Ask for specific adjustments, using the examples in DfE's guidance, and ask for them in writing. 5. Agree a written plan with a clear review date ([SEND Code of Practice, para 6.48](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/5a7dcb85ed915d2ac884d995/SEND_Code_of_Practice_January_2015.pdf)). 6. If your child has an EHCP, ask the council for an early review. ### Will I be fined? Not automatically. Schools must consider a penalty notice once a pupil reaches 10 sessions of unauthorised absence in a rolling period of 10 school weeks. But the first question in the guidance is "Is support appropriate in this case?" If it is, schools "are expected to continue with the existing support without a penalty notice", or to issue a notice to improve if support is not working or not being taken up. A penalty notice can follow if neither works. Schools should also weigh their Equality Act duties to disabled pupils ([DfE attendance guidance, paras 184 to 185](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a4f9ec6a6586e258d371bd0/Working_together_to_improve_school_attendance_2026.pdf)). > **Evidence check:** These steps come from DfE's statutory guidance and SEND law, not from research trials. We found no trials on the best way to help an autistic child back into school, so review any plan often and change what is not working. ## Is a part-time timetable legal? A [part-time timetable](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#part-time-timetable) can be legal, but only in limited cases. DfE's attendance guidance says every pupil of compulsory school age is entitled to a full-time education. A temporary part-time timetable is for "very exceptional circumstances, where it is in a pupil's best interests", and it "should not be used to manage a pupil's behaviour" ([DfE attendance guidance, paras 65 to 70](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a4f9ec6a6586e258d371bd0/Working_together_to_improve_school_attendance_2026.pdf)). It should: - have the agreement of both the school and you, as the parent your child normally lives with - be part of a wider support, health care or reintegration plan - have regular review dates that involve you and your child - have a proposed end date, although it can be extended at a review If your child has an EHCP, the school should discuss the timetable with the council so the support package can be reviewed. The guidance was last updated on 9 July 2026 ([GOV.UK](https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/working-together-to-improve-school-attendance)). > **Try this:** Before you agree, ask for the plan, the review dates and the end date in writing. You can say no, or ask for changes, if it is not in your child's interests. ## My child keeps being sent home. Is that an exclusion? If it is because of behaviour, yes. Being sent home without the formal process is often called an informal exclusion. DfE's exclusion guidance, in force from 26 July 2026, says: "Telling or forcing a pupil to leave school, or not allowing them to attend school, is a suspension (if temporary) or permanent exclusion (if permanent)" ([DfE exclusion guidance](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a63426d9a419980593b2b80/suspension-and-permanent-exclusion-from-maintained-schools-academies-and-pupil-referral-units-in-England-including-pupil-movement-effective-from-26-July-2026.pdf)). The guidance also says: - A half-day [suspension](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#suspension-and-exclusion) is allowed, but the formal process must be followed and you must be told in writing, with reasons. - "Any time a pupil is sent home due to disciplinary reasons and asked to log on or utilise online pathways should always be recorded as a suspension." - "Any exclusion of a pupil, even for short periods, must be formally recorded. It would also be unlawful to exclude a pupil simply because they have SEN or a disability that the school feels it is unable to meet." - Its examples of off-rolling, meaning removing a pupil improperly, include "sending a pupil home without a formal suspension regardless of whether it occurs with the agreement of parents" and "placing a pupil on a part-time timetable for behavioural reasons". During a suspension, the school should set and mark work for the first five school days, and its duties to disabled pupils, such as reasonable adjustments, carry on. If a suspension lasts more than five school days in a row, the school must arrange full-time education from the sixth day. After a permanent exclusion, the council must do this. If your child is permanently excluded, you can ask for an SEN expert at the independent review panel. If you think an exclusion was disability discrimination, you can make a claim to the SEND Tribunal within six months ([DfE exclusion guidance](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a63426d9a419980593b2b80/suspension-and-permanent-exclusion-from-maintained-schools-academies-and-pupil-referral-units-in-England-including-pupil-movement-effective-from-26-July-2026.pdf); [GOV.UK](https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/school-suspensions-and-permanent-exclusions)). > **Myth:** "Being sent home to calm down is not an exclusion." If your child is told to leave school because of their behaviour, it is a suspension, and it must be recorded and confirmed in writing ([DfE exclusion guidance](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a63426d9a419980593b2b80/suspension-and-permanent-exclusion-from-maintained-schools-academies-and-pupil-referral-units-in-England-including-pupil-movement-effective-from-26-July-2026.pdf)). ## What are the rules on restraint and seclusion? Since 1 April 2026, schools in England follow new DfE guidance on restrictive interventions, including reasonable force ([GOV.UK](https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/use-of-reasonable-force-in-schools)). Schools also have a new legal duty to record and report seclusion and restraint ([DfE restrictive interventions guidance](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6943dad6501cdd438f4cf5aa/Restrictive_interventions_including_use_of_reasonable_force_in_schools.pdf)). The guidance says: - "It is illegal to use force on a pupil for the purpose of punishment." - Schools must report each significant use of force to you "as soon as practicable after the incident, and they should endeavour to do this no later than the same day", and should do so in writing. The report should cover when, where and for how long, why force was needed, what kind of force was used and how much, and any injuries. - You must be told about seclusion and restraint as soon as practicable, ideally the same day. Maintained schools must have a way for you to get a copy of the written record. - Pupils "should not be restrained in a way that affects their airway, breathing or circulation", and holds on the ground should be released or changed as quickly as possible. - For pupils with SEND, triggers "may include pain, sensory overload, unfamiliar situations", and behaviour support plans should be reviewed with you and your child. Schools should not agree to requests never to use force. Instead, ask to help write and review your child's behaviour support plan, so staff know your child's early signs of distress and what helps them calm. If your child is hurt, get medical advice promptly and ask for the written record. ## What should I do if school is not working? Start with the school, put things in writing, and get independent advice early. 1. Keep a log of every phone call, early collection and incident: the date, the time, who said what, and whether it was about behaviour. 2. Ask the school in writing whether each early collection was a suspension. 3. Meet the SENCO and ask for a review of your child's [SEN support](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#sen-support): what support they get, what it should achieve, and a review date. Ask whether a specialist should be involved ([SEND Code of Practice, paras 6.48 to 6.59](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/5a7dcb85ed915d2ac884d995/SEND_Code_of_Practice_January_2015.pdf)). 4. Ask for reasonable adjustments in writing. Schools must make them for disabled pupils ([Equality Act 2010, Schedule 13](https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2010/15/schedule/13)). 5. If things are still not working, ask the council for an [EHC needs assessment](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#ehc-needs-assessment) yourself ([Children and Families Act 2014, section 36](https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2014/6/section/36)). If your child already has an EHCP, ask for an early review. Our guide on [requesting an EHC needs assessment](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/guides/how-to-request-an-ehcp) explains how. 6. Get free advice from SENDIASS or IPSEA before any big decision. | What is happening | Your rights in England | Who to contact | |---|---|---| | Your child is too anxious to go in | Support and adjustments come first; a fine should not be the first step | SENCO, then SENDIASS | | School suggests a part-time timetable | Should have your agreement, reviews and an end date; not for managing behaviour | SENCO; IPSEA if unsure | | You are called to collect your child for behaviour | It is a suspension: recorded, with written reasons | Head teacher, in writing | | School says it "can't meet needs" | Excluding for that reason alone is unlawful | SENCO; council SEN team; IPSEA | | Your child was restrained or secluded | A written report, aiming for the same day | Head teacher; SENDIASS | | Suspended for over 5 days, or permanently excluded | Full-time education from the sixth school day | School (suspension) or council (exclusion) | | You feel pushed to home educate | This can count as off-rolling | SENDIASS or IPSEA, before you decide | ## Should we think about home education? [Elective home education](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/glossary#elective-home-education) is a big decision, and it should be your free choice. Get independent advice first. - DfE's exclusion guidance counts "exercising undue influence over a parent to remove their child from the school under the threat of a permanent exclusion and encouraging them to choose Elective Home Education or another school place" as off-rolling, and Ofsted considers any evidence of it ([DfE exclusion guidance](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a63426d9a419980593b2b80/suspension-and-permanent-exclusion-from-maintained-schools-academies-and-pupil-referral-units-in-England-including-pupil-movement-effective-from-26-July-2026.pdf)). - The Children's Wellbeing and Schools Act 2026 became law on 29 April 2026. It brings in "Children Not in School" registers in every council in England, and extra checks before some children can be taken out of school, including "children attending special schools" ([DfE Education Hub](https://educationhub.blog.gov.uk/2026/05/the-childrens-wellbeing-bill-what-parents-need-to-know/)). - Under the Act, parents of a child at a special school, or an independent school specially organised for SEN, will need the council's consent before taking them out to home educate. The council can refuse if school is in the child's best interests or the planned home education is not adequate; otherwise it must agree, and a refusal can be referred to the Secretary of State. Taking the child out without consent is an offence ([Browne Jacobson](https://www.brownejacobson.com/insights/legal-views-on-the-childrens-wellbeing-and-schools-act-2026/attendance-and-children-not-in-school)). - As of September 2026, we could not confirm whether these parts of the Act are in force yet. Check with your council or SENDIASS before you act. Some children with EHCPs are taught outside school in an arrangement the council makes, called education otherwise than at school (EOTAS): 16,000 children and young people with EHCPs in England had EOTAS in January 2026 ([DfE](https://explore-education-statistics.service.gov.uk/find-statistics/education-health-and-care-plans)). Ask SENDIASS or IPSEA which options could suit your child. ## Where can I get help? - **Your local [SENDIASS](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/where-to-get-help#sendiass):** free, impartial advice on SEND, exclusions and attendance. Find yours through the [Council for Disabled Children](https://councilfordisabledchildren.org.uk/information-advice-and-support-services-network/find-your-local-ias-service/). - **[IPSEA](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/where-to-get-help#ipsea):** free legal advice by appointment, a tribunal helpline, and template letters ([IPSEA](https://www.ipsea.org.uk/Pages/Category/service-overview/)). - **[SOS!SEN](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/where-to-get-help#sossen):** a free, term-time helpline ([SOS!SEN](https://sossen.org.uk/services/helpline/)). - **[Contact](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/where-to-get-help#contact):** a free helpline on 0808 808 3555 for families with a disabled child ([Contact](https://contact.org.uk/about-contact/contact-us/)). - **For your child's anxiety or mental health:** your GP, or the [YoungMinds Parents Helpline](https://www.youngminds.org.uk/parent/parents-helpline-and-webchat/) on 0808 802 5544 (see our [help page](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/where-to-get-help#youngminds)). > **Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland:** The guidance in this article is for England. Scotland has additional support for learning, Wales has additional learning needs, and Northern Ireland uses statements of SEN. For advice, contact [Enquire](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/where-to-get-help#enquire) in Scotland, [SNAP Cymru](https://rocksmakepebbles.co.uk/where-to-get-help#snap-cymru) in Wales, or Contact anywhere in the UK. ## Questions parents ask ### School keeps ringing me to collect my child early. Is that allowed? If your child is sent home because of their behaviour, it is a suspension, even if it is only for an afternoon or they are asked to log on from home. DfE guidance in force from 26 July 2026 says any exclusion, even for a short time, must be formally recorded, and you must be told in writing with the reasons. This applies even if you agree to collect your child. Ask the school in writing whether each early collection was a suspension, and keep a log of the dates. ### School wants my child on a part-time timetable. Do I have to agree? No. DfE's attendance guidance says a part-time timetable should have the agreement of both the school and the parent the child normally lives with. It is only for very exceptional circumstances where it is in your child's best interests, and it should not be used to manage behaviour. It should be part of a wider support plan, with regular reviews and an end date. If your child has an EHCP, the school should discuss it with the council. ### My child is too anxious to go to school. Will I be fined? Not automatically. Schools must consider a penalty notice once a pupil has 10 sessions of unauthorised absence in a rolling 10 school weeks, but DfE's guidance says the first question is whether support is appropriate. If it is, schools are expected to carry on with support without a penalty notice, or to issue a notice to improve, though a penalty notice can follow if these do not work. Schools should also weigh their Equality Act duties to disabled pupils. Ask in writing for reasonable adjustments, a time-limited phased return and, if your child has an EHCP, an early review. ### Can a school exclude my child because it says it can't meet their needs? No. DfE's exclusion guidance, in force from 26 July 2026, says it would be unlawful to exclude a pupil simply because they have special educational needs or a disability that the school feels it is unable to meet. If the school says it is struggling, ask for more support instead: a review of SEN support, reasonable adjustments, an EHC needs assessment, or an early review of an existing EHCP. SENDIASS or IPSEA can advise you for free. ### What is emotionally based school avoidance (EBSA)? Emotionally based school avoidance is a name for when a child finds it very hard to go to school because of anxiety or distress. It is not a legal term. DfE's attendance guidance talks about anxious feelings about school attendance, and says schools should offer pastoral support, make reasonable adjustments for disabled pupils and consider a time-limited phased return. A child who feels this way needs support and understanding, not blame. ### Can school staff restrain my autistic child, and will they tell me? Staff can use reasonable force in some situations, but never as a punishment. Since 1 April 2026, schools in England follow new guidance: they must report each significant use of force to you as soon as practicable, aiming for the same day, and should do it in writing, including why it was needed and any injuries. You should also be told about seclusion and restraint, ideally the same day. Pupils should not be restrained in a way that affects their airway, breathing or circulation. ### Should I take my child out of school and home educate? Only if it is truly your choice, and after independent advice. DfE guidance counts pressure on a parent to home educate under the threat of permanent exclusion as off-rolling. If your child is at a special school, the Children's Wellbeing and Schools Act 2026 will require council consent before you take them out to home educate. We could not confirm whether that part is in force yet, so check with SENDIASS or your council first. ## Sources 1. [GP out of hours service](https://www.nidirect.gov.uk/articles/gp-out-hours-service), nidirect, 26 November 2024 2. [Working together to improve school attendance (statutory guidance)](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a4f9ec6a6586e258d371bd0/Working_together_to_improve_school_attendance_2026.pdf), Department for Education, July 2026 3. [Working together to improve school attendance (publication page)](https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/working-together-to-improve-school-attendance), GOV.UK, 9 July 2026 4. [Suspension and permanent exclusion guidance, effective from 26 July 2026](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6a63426d9a419980593b2b80/suspension-and-permanent-exclusion-from-maintained-schools-academies-and-pupil-referral-units-in-England-including-pupil-movement-effective-from-26-July-2026.pdf), Department for Education, July 2026 5. [School suspensions and permanent exclusions](https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/school-suspensions-and-permanent-exclusions), GOV.UK 6. [Restrictive interventions, including the use of reasonable force, in schools](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6943dad6501cdd438f4cf5aa/Restrictive_interventions_including_use_of_reasonable_force_in_schools.pdf), Department for Education, April 2026 7. [Use of reasonable force in schools (publication page)](https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/use-of-reasonable-force-in-schools), GOV.UK 8. [Supporting an autistic child](https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/autism/supporting-a-child/), NHS, 6 May 2026 9. [Masking](https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/behaviour/masking), National Autistic Society 10. [Anxiety: a guide for parents](https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/mental-health/anxiety/parents), National Autistic Society, January 2021 11. [SEND code of practice: 0 to 25 years](https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/5a7dcb85ed915d2ac884d995/SEND_Code_of_Practice_January_2015.pdf), Department for Education, January 2015 12. [Equality Act 2010, Schedule 13](https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2010/15/schedule/13), legislation.gov.uk 13. [Children and Families Act 2014, section 36](https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2014/6/section/36), legislation.gov.uk 14. [The Children's Wellbeing and Schools Act: what parents need to know](https://educationhub.blog.gov.uk/2026/05/the-childrens-wellbeing-bill-what-parents-need-to-know/), Department for Education (Education Hub), 12 May 2026 15. [Legal views on the Children's Wellbeing and Schools Act 2026: attendance and children not in school](https://www.brownejacobson.com/insights/legal-views-on-the-childrens-wellbeing-and-schools-act-2026/attendance-and-children-not-in-school), Browne Jacobson, 12 June 2026 16. [Education, health and care plans, reporting year 2026](https://explore-education-statistics.service.gov.uk/find-statistics/education-health-and-care-plans), Department for Education, 25 June 2026 17. [Find your local IAS service](https://councilfordisabledchildren.org.uk/information-advice-and-support-services-network/find-your-local-ias-service/), Council for Disabled Children 18. [Our helplines and services](https://www.ipsea.org.uk/Pages/Category/service-overview/), IPSEA 19. [Helpline](https://sossen.org.uk/services/helpline/), SOS!SEN 20. [Contact us](https://contact.org.uk/about-contact/contact-us/), Contact 21. [Parents Helpline and webchat](https://www.youngminds.org.uk/parent/parents-helpline-and-webchat/), YoungMinds --- General information for families in the UK, not medical, legal or financial advice. If you are worried about your child's health, contact your GP or call NHS 111 (in Northern Ireland, your GP out of hours service). In an emergency, call 999.